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Fall In Love With Imperfection.

1/8/2023

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Kristen Sohlman, MACP RP
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Nobody is perfect.  Everyone is flawed.  Everyone makes mistakes. Your desire to be perfect may be hurting you more than it is helping you.  Accepting your flaws is self-compassionate.
Self-compassion increases psychological wellbeing and mental health, increases your resiliency and ability to cope, and reduces stress when faced with difficult situations.

Accepting yourself through self-compassion increases also your acceptance and self-compassion of others.  Recognizing the imperfection in ourselves is recognition of being human. Recognizing the imperfection of others is recognition of shared humanity. The way we accept others is a reflection of how we accept ourself.

How to Fall in Love with Imperfection:
  1. Embrace Imperfection: Set yourself free from the need to be perfect.    
  2. Acceptance: Accept yourself for who you are. Accept yourself as human and beautifully flawed. Accept others for who they are.  Accept others as human and beautifully flawed.  
  3. Connection over Perfection: Connect with others through your imperfections. Celebrate the things that make you human including your insecurities, quirks, and struggles.  
  4. Realistic Expectations: Set realistic expectations of yourself and others. Watch for the dichotomy of over achieving and under achieving.  You cannot do it all!  You are cable of more than you think!
  5. Make Mistakes: Go ahead and make mistakes. This is how we learn and grow. Do not beat yourself up for making mistakes.  One thing that is certain is that the longer you live, the more mistakes you will make!
  6. Let Go: Let go of comparisons. You don’t have to prove your worth. Let yourself go. Experience freedom. Relax.  Have fun!
  7. Try New Things: Be brave and take a risk. Embrace yourself in a new activity or interest. Be curious about other people’s experiences.  Try. Fail.
  8. Self Worth: Your worth is much more than your failures, accomplishments or what others think of you, including yourself!
 
References:
Martin, S. (2021). Embrace your imperfections: Free yourself from the need to be perfect. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com
Zhang, Chen, & Shakur. (2020). From me to you: Self-compassion predicts acceptance of own and others’ imperfections. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 46 (2), 228–242. Retrieved from https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167219853846
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    Disclaimer: Kelly Magazine, along with all articles and blog posts, is for informational purposes only. It is not intended to provide personal support as an alternative to psychotherapy services. Please note that replies are viewable by the public, and we may take a few days to respond. If you require immediate assistance, please call Kelly Mental Health during business hours. 
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