Going Through a Breakup? Time for a New Look!

By: Kelly Halonen, MSW, RSW

​Often after a breakup, you’ll see people cut or dye their hair, get a piercing or tattoo, or change their wardrobe. I, for one, am guilty of all of the above. But why do we do this?

Changing your appearance is a common coping mechanism. You don’t have to consider what anyone else might like or not like; you make a change that YOU want. It can be a way of rebelling against traditional gender norms or even just your ex. You’re taking back your power and freedom, something that may have lacked in your relationship.
 
Often when relationships fall apart, we feel like we have no control over what is happening. Changing your look is something that you can control. Feeling like you are in control of your life helps you have more hope about your present situation and future.
 
By making a bold change in your appearance, it symbolizes a “new” you and a fresh start. It’s a chance for you to make a change for the better. You’re symbolically getting rid of the old you, and moving onto something better.
 
Giving yourself a new look can also bring back your confidence and boost your self-esteem, something that may be damaged after a breakup. You can begin to feel like your sexy self again, and not feel “broken” from the relationship.
 
Making a change that you like can also help lift your spirits after going through something as upsetting as a breakup. It can help get you out of a depressing slump, and put you on your feet again, ready to face the world!
 
So, if you’re going through a breakup and feel like making a change, go for it! Life is full of changes that we have to adapt to or overcome. Giving yourself the power and confidence to do so by changing your appearance isn’t a bad thing.