"What’s wrong with me? Why couldn’t he love me if he’s so happy with her?"

By Linda Kelly, MSW, RSW

"I was so good to him! I did everything I could to be a good girlfriend and now he seems so much happier with someone else. Am I broken? What is wrong with me?"

Do you remember building puzzles as a kid? 
I do. 

Sometimes you’d find two pieces that fit together so well that they had to be right. But…the pictures didn’t line up. 
No matter what you did, they just didn't fit. 
You'd look around the table, searching through a sea of other pieces that just weren't right, and you were convinced that the ones in your hand had to fit, out of necessity, out of a lack of options, or because you just wanted them to. 

Every living person looks for connection. We all want to be understood; many of us long for that one person who will make us feel complete. And sometimes, just when you think you’ve found the person, they leave.  

If they go off and find someone with whom they connect deeply, that does not, and SHOULD not, impact your value as a human being. 

As much as you might have wanted the connection to work, it didn't. The puzzle pieces didn't fit together. 
It's not a matter of someone being better or worse, valued, or valueless. 

You’re not for them. And that’s okay. You fit better somewhere else.