Just because I’m a therapist does NOT mean I have all the answers. In fact, seeing it time and time again just means that I have even more questions about it. So in the interest of supporting others to live their best lives, myself included, I offer the following responses:

Why does someone else’s race, ethnicity, beliefs, age, sexual orientation, or religion offend you?
It’s their lives, not yours. There’s them, and there’s you. You do you.

Why do people think the choices they made for their lives (e.g. attending University, having children) are the right choices for another person’s life, and feel the need to project that on them?
Life has so many options. You do You.
 
Why so much judgement and criticism against another person’s decisions (e.g. going on vacation, career choice, moving, how someone spends their money, who they spend their time with)?
Different things make different people tick. You do You.

Why do people bond over gossiping about another person’s problems?
You have problems too, and gossiping makes you untrustworthy. You do You.

Why do mothers shame other mothers for their parenting choices?
It’s their babies. You do you.

Why do people believe that their way of handling something (e.g. pet training, cleaning, relationships) is better than someone else’s?
Your way isn’t the only way, so why be so close minded? You do you.

Why do people feel the need to give advice to someone who isn’t asking for it?
Straight up - You do You.

Why does a person believe that their sense of taste or style is better than someone else’s?
If it’s different than yours, it doesn’t mean it’s better or worse, it’s just different. You do you.

Why does the number/degree of someone else’s achievements, or lack thereof, matter?
Comparing yourself to others does not make you any better or worse of a person. You do you.

Why do people share oppositional opinions about someone’s difficult life choices (e.g. termination of pregnancy, divorce), when they have not had to make that choice themselves, and truly have no idea what was involved?
You do you.

Why so nosy (well I’m allowed to be, during working hours at least!)?
You can ask but don’t push. Be respectful. You do you.

Why do people feel that they know what is best for another person? Even if they do, and they’re right - know your audience, and only share if it’s appropriate.
One last time for the people in the back...

YOU
DO
​YOU.

It’s so hard to be the in-between generation, the one that breaks the cycle of abuse, mistreatment, or even plain-old cruelty (often minimized as political incorrectness).
 
You get to go through the process of acknowledging what has to change, grieving what was lost, learning how to make things better, and fighting against the current that tries to pull you back into the comfortable and familiar.
 
You get the satisfaction of “being the change,” ensuring that the next generation never knows that kind of pain and insecurity. You create a better life for them, but you can’t recapture any of the time you spent under the spell of what you believed to be normal. You can’t change the past, and you have to live with that. 
 
This edition of Kelly Magazine is about relationships. It’s about the ones that define us, challenge us, excite us, and betray us. Relationships, after all, are the connections we have that define who we are and who we will become. We need healthy relationships to support us when we try to change our lives for the better, since we all know how hard it is go it alone, letting go of everything you knew for the chance to be something more. This edition is full of stories and advice about how to face tough issues with family and friends in a way that preserves your connection with them while remaining true to yourself. 
 
Our hope, with this edition, is that every individual reading this will find something that helps them to make peace with the past, to learn how to cope with the present, and to give as good as they get to create healthier relationships and to be part of an open-minded, flexible, and adaptable community of people. 
 
So if you decide to “be the change,” stepping out of your comfort zone with the hope of making life better for you and everyone around you, know that you’re not alone.
 
We’re with you.

​𝒷𝓎​ Jennifer Robinson, MSW, RSW

𝒷𝓎​ ​Kelly Graham, MSW, RSW

𝒷𝓎​ Marianne Wylie, MSW, RSW

𝒷𝓎​ Linda Kelly, MSW, RSW

𝒷𝓎​ Marianne Wylie, MSW, RSW

𝒷𝓎​ Lara Hollway, MSW, RSW

𝒷𝓎​ Piper Rasmussen

The science of happiness tells us that being happy is basically...  a choice. Yup, you heard me, a choice. As if it was that easy. But, if you’re struggling to make lemonade when it feels like all life hands you are lemons, you are not alone. Here are a couple things to keep in mind when you're struggling to see the sunshine among all that rain. 

You are wanted & you are needed
Take a second and think about the most important people in your life. I guarantee you, whoever it is, they want to see you happy. Have you spent time with them lately? If you’re looking for a reason to be happy, this is the place to start.
 
You can’t buy happiness
Time to let go of the jealousy and materialistic longing. Happiness doesn’t come from having the nicest car, or the best clothes. Happiness comes from confidence and knowing your worth.
 
Sleep more
We know that sleep helps our body recover from the day and repair itself. Sleep helps us focus and be more productive. It turns out, sleep is also important for happiness. Allowing your brain to rest will make facing those tough emotions easier and more manageable.
 
Happy people are healthier
​“Happy” habits include letting go of grudges, expressing gratitude, treating others with kindness and regarding your problems as challenges. Living in the present, waking up at the same time each morning, eating right and exercising are other “secrets” that happy people tend to embrace.