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By: Laura Groulx, MSW, RSW  Recently, I have really been reflecting on the meaning behind the cliché about our lives being broken down into “chapters”. I have been seeing it this way more now than ever before, in both my life, and in the lives of the people around me. Our lives can change so dramatically in one day, by either making a single choice, or having something happen around us that is totally out of our control. Life is fluid and dynamic, and the uncertainty of it all can feel kind of scary.
By: Lara Hollway, MSW,RSW  Has your partner ever come to you with a problem and you offer advice, only to have them seem to get upset and/or frustrated with you? Do you find yourself getting frustrated because your partner keeps complaining about a problem but doesn’t seem to want to listen to your solutions? Or does your partner ever say things like “you never listen to me”, when you feel like you are listening and trying to help?
If so, you are not alone. This is a common theme in relationships, and a perfect example of how the best intentions do not always equate to the best results. Read on for a breakdown of this situation, and some suggestions for changing this dynamic. Seija Grant, MEd CP, RP  I have now heard this account from several people, and am one of these people myself. Despite the ongoing trauma, state of chaos and challenges around this pandemic, there are some people who are relieved by the break from normalcy, and in fact maybe really needed the break. If this sounds familiar: don’t worry, you are not alone, nor is there anything wrong with how you’re feeling.
By: Kelly Graham, MSW, RS  If you’re anything like me, you love sleeping in and hate waking up early for anything. While this lifestyle was alright in my teenage years, the older I got, the more I wanted to wake up and be productive in the morning. While this is much easier said than done, here are some tips that can help you learn to rise with the birds and get stuff done.
Seija Grant, MEd CP, RP  I regularly see clients who are struggling with day to day functioning because of their mental health, and are feeling emotionally overwhelmed. This happens to all of us at some point, and it often feels like making positive change can be impossible. I would like to remind you about the importance of ‘getting back to the basics’ as this can have a significant impact on your well-being and health. We frequently (as a society and as individuals) take these things for granted.
By: Laura Groulx, MSW, RSW  I talk to a lot of people. Like really talk. Typically, in my first meeting with a new client, I’ll ask what their goals are for counselling. As in, what is it that they are looking to change about themselves, or what can I support them through.
An answer I often encounter is this: I want to be happy. This is a big goal. What does this even mean?? By: Laura Groulx, MSW, RSW  Change can be hard. Like really hard. There are some people that thrive in a changing environment, however, many (like me!), prefer structure, routine, and predictability. Unfortunately for us structure-lovers, life isn’t always so predictable.
By: Kristen Sohlman, MACP, RP  The experience of coping with difficult situations, significant changes in life, and other life challenges might leave you feeling low in mood and even hopeless. The challenge with feelings of hopelessness is that this feeling carries with it a certain reality: that things won’t get better, that it is not worth trying, and that you might as well just give up.
By: Jordan Gross, RN TBRHSC  Right Now I am scared…. I am a Nurse and my job is to face the beast that the rest of the world is hiding from and is informed to avoid at all costs.
By: Kelly Graham, MSW, RSW  Right now, a lot of people are feeling stressed, anxious, and afraid. We don’t know how badly COVID-19 will affect Canada or Thunder Bay. We are also unsure of when schools and workplaces will open, and when we can spend time with family and friends.
By: Kristen Sohlman, MACP, RP  Looking for some fun things to do online this long weekend? Here are a few ideas to try out!
By: Kelly Graham, MSW, RSW  Growing up you’ve probably been taught that you shouldn’t talk about masturbation, or maybe even that you shouldn’t masturbate. Because this is something that is not talked about and seen as a “taboo” subject, many people don’t know how good masturbating can be for you.
By: Kelly Graham MSW, RSW  A dilemma that comes up as everyone continues to self-isolate is how to spend your time. One enjoyable activity that may help you feel better is sex, either with your partner, or (oh yes, we’re going there!) with yourself!
By: Kristen Sohlman, MACP, RP  Are you feeling that the world has changed so much? Are you feeling helpless? Are you feeling sad? You may not be just depressed; you may be grieving. The grief response happens when there are significant changes in life, when things will not go back to the way they used to be, when there is a loss of normalcy, a loss of connection, when there is worry or fear, and all of this is hitting us in a short period of time.
By: Kristen Sohlman, MACP.RP  The reality faced by many today is the difficult impacts that COVID-19 and social distancing, while necessary, have had on people coping with substance use and addictive disorders.
By: Kelly Graham, MSW, RSW  You’ve probably been bombarded with articles about how you should use your time in self-isolation to better yourself (learn a language, play an instrument, etc.). However, this can be hard for a lot of people. We are feeling stressed and anxious about what is happening in the world, and for some people that isn't easy to overcome.
By: Laura Groulx, MSW, RSW  I don’t have answers, only thoughts. I’m not a lawyer, but I do speak with a lot of people about relationships and family dynamics. Recently, with everything happening in the world, I’ve been wondering how co-parents are handling shared custody and access regarding children that are currently in isolation; after all, some children have more than one family.
By: Cassandra Nordal  This is obviously a scary time for us all. Hour by hour, we are watching our world change so drastically that we are all in a state of constant worry and panic. We have been focusing on the detrimental health risk and factors that this virus is causing, and now, we need to talk about the impact this is having on our mental health.
 The idea of surviving isolation with your partner may spur mixed emotions. We are with our partners because we fell in love, so much so, that we have committed ourselves to this other person completely. Well, maybe not completely. Let’s get real: We love our partners, but sometimes too much of a good thing is, as they say, too much. Relationships still require a sense of individuality and independence. We all need our space - space is healthy! However, we may be finding that we have less space from our partner when many of us are spending more time at home. Here are a few ideas on how to cope with increased togetherness:
By: Seija Grant, Med CP, RP  Wow! Things are feeling a little chaotic and overwhelming, and certainly anxiety-provoking out there. I am not immune to that as a therapist, and was thinking about what can be done to ease some of the mental (and physical) tension in our community. One such skill that can be cultivated and applied during these tough times is ‘Mindful Self-Compassion’ (MSC). I realize this may be a new concept for many of you, so I will give a brief overview of what this is and how this may be helpful during this tense time.
By: Kelly Graham, MSW, RSW  Most pet owners know that pets aren’t just pets; they are part of the family. But why is that exactly?
As our attachment grows, we often begin to view our animal companion as having an important place within our lives and family dynamic. While our pet can be cute, there is more than just the cuteness factor that makes them play such a large role in our lives. By Kelly Graham, MSW, RSW  *This article primarily uses examples from female on male sexual violence, but the reality of sexual assault is that it applies to all genders, all ages, and all ethnicities.
1 in 6 men will experience sexual violence in their lifetime. While it seems obvious that anybody can be a target of sexual violence, male survivors face a different kind of stigma. Just like with most sexual violence, the survivor knows the perpetrator the majority of the time. Men can be hurt by their partners, friends, parents, teachers or employers, acquaintances, anybody. Just like with mental health, men are more likely to stay silent and not seek help. They may feel embarrassed, ashamed, or fear the response they will get. While many women sadly know the victim-blaming responses that are met with reporting a sexual assault, men face similar ones. People may think that they should’ve stopped it, or that they are “weak" because it happened. They say that they should just “man up" and get over it, without realizing the devastating effects that sexual violence has on a person. By Laura Groulx, MSW, RSW When I think about the concept of body image, my mind associates this concept with women. At first, I wondered if this was the case because I’m a woman myself. It turns out, that all I had to do to validate my association was search “body image” in Google Images, because my screen was instantly filled with photos of women. Go ahead, give it a try! To me, this simple search speaks volumes. However, the odd image of a man did pop up. Notably, one particular photo of a man spoke to me: it’s an image of a man holding up a sign saying “It’s just as hard to be Ken as it is to be Barbie”. This seems so obvious. So true. So why the distortion? Image source: https://www.sbs.com.au/guide/article/2017/06/13/comment-we-need-talk-about-male-body-image
Your partner's choice to be unfaithful was theirs alone, and that decision does not reflect how valuable you are.   A smile goes a long way – not just for other people, but for the person smiling too.   Marianne Wylie, MSW, RSW - being the little ray of sunshine that she is! |
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Written for you, by local therapists.
OverviewNWO’s source for all things relationships, mental health, wellness, and lifestyle: Kelly Magazine is a mental health outreach initiative created by Kelly Mental Health and supported by Kelly Mental Health Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated to improving the community in the area of mental health.
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